Permissive Parenting Will Lead to a Concerning Future for Gen Alpha

You’re at a restaurant with your family enjoying a nice meal together. A few tables over, you notice a young child blasting music or videos from their grimy iPad. The child seemingly does not consider how their actions affect those around them, or perhaps were not trained to care. The parents or guardians of the child seem visibly exhausted or simply don’t pay any mind to their child’s obnoxious behavior.

Generation Alpha, commonly referred to as Gen Alpha, characterizes those born between 2010-2024 and are often the children of Millenials. Many have raised concerns with Gen Alpha’s multitude of behavioral issues, primarily linking these issues to the parents who are raising them, pointing out techniques such as “gentle parenting” and “permissive parenting.” Gentle parenting is based on empathy and understanding, viewing discipline as non-punitive and utilizing it as a teaching tool. Permissive parenting is characterized by loving and nurturing tendencies, however, there is a clear lack of discipline, rules, structure, and they tend to have lower expectations for their children. With a greater emphasis on mental health, many modern parents tend to focus more on guiding their children through complex emotions rather than punishing them as harshly as their parents may have.

In theory, gentle parenting sounds like a revolutionary parenting style that leads to children handling challenging emotions in a mature manner that perhaps many adults wish their parents had applied growing up. However, gentle parenting can be misused in situations where their child is being more aggressive or oppositional, in which more stern discipline is required to ensure that the behavior is not likely to be repeated. As a result of this lax attitude, children may lack the ability to appropriately regulate their emotions and respond to disciplinary action.

Parents often seek to replicate the techniques their parents used on them growing up that they found favorable, and detach themselves from the methods they found to be toxic or were more generally adverse to. Millennials were raised by Baby Boomers or early Gen X parents. Their parenting was characterized by “wanting what's best for their children,” which often meant tough love, and at times, emotional abandonment, leading to resentment into their adulthood.

Generation Alpha is the first to be entirely born in the 21st century and grow up in a fully digitized world. It has been deeply normalized in our society to give young children internet access, often before they can even speak. Many social media platforms, the most popular of which include YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, have algorithms thoughtfully designed to keep their users hooked and craving more. Short-form video content in particular is actively reducing the attention spans of those who engage with it. Children are naturally attracted to the shiny dopamine rushes on these platforms that they can’t take their eyes off of.

With an overload of information and options in our current world, and the fact that Gen Alpha is often overprotected and coddled, they tend to be a highly anxious group of individuals with a dangerously low attention span. This kind of environment makes kids more prone to outbursts and tantrums.

Considering our modern economy, families are more likely than previous generations to have two working parents in the household, resulting in a decrease of stay-at-home parents. After a long day at work, parents are often too drained to deal with their children’s high demands or attitude. An iPad does the trick at keeping children occupied and quiet, allowing parents to destress and complete adult responsibilities. According to generationalpha.com, children aged 8-12 in the United States spend an average of 4 hours and 44 minutes on screens every day for entertainment purposes.

Ultimately, a culmination of coddling, permissive parents, as well as low attention spans spells a concerning future for Gen Alpha. As they grow older and become more assimilated in society, lingering effects of the way they were raised, or lack thereof, may become increasingly apparent. For instance, they may display an entitled or an otherwise selfish, “all about me” attitude. Not to mention the superficial aspect and perfect facade that many influencers plaster all over social media is bound to have detrimental effects on young people’s self-esteem and perception of what people look like in real life. In the workplace, Gen Alpha may not be as likely to take accountability for their actions or adhere to deadlines. Given that Gen Alpha will eventually be the ones who run our world, we should normalize a parenting style and lifestyle that prioritizes mental health, accountability, humility, and taking time to disconnect from screens to make memories with loved ones.